Edit my life please: Have you ever felt like if you could edit your life you would? I have and what parts I would elegantly remove along with the people memories I seem to trip over. Of course that is not possible but what a sweet perfumed thought if I could, then I think of Marilyn Manson who near fatal himself climbing on a stage prop like ? WHY? Had he really thought it out or just a flash thought of inspiration soon leading to his hospital stretcher journey. I have been like that in my life as I reach for people that don't deserve me and who definitely do not understand my thought process. After they read my blog they seem to know who I am not comprehending that IF I was to be that to them the mere assumption on their part ruined it, some where Billy Joel's song echoes " We didn't start the fire", plays out but lyrics replaced by " He just stamped out the fire", sigh it seems to always be this way.
Not interested :
I used to wake in the middle of the night because of bad dreams but I don't anymore I rest deeply and my sleep is a coverlet. I can remember my dreams is the play out in senseless story form I don't worry I don't stress just never going to be another day like this one another possibility. what you just don't care anymore there's whole inside of you and it's just her for a long time
I looked back at music's once played songs posted I thought I would just for me but like everything else fall said nothing was to nothing was ever true. One of many why didn't I think of that? I look at the Music understood songs that used to mean something to me I seriously can't remember why? I'm disgusted and disillusioned by the playlists scattered all around me. It's words of constant lies remind me he's not worth any of my good energy One of many and now he is too.
Spit that out before you choke:
Feeling vibes Like a soul sent to be eaten. Fear … see it. Now. Saw fear in his eyes.. could not feel .. mouth piece... saw it the other dream. ..Near tears when he realized the cost in Rome too late to run … Mouth piece.... that pressed against me ...ssshhhhh. Blonde hair Mouth piece cannot speak. Muted. Eyes wide The dream would not let me wake ... his voice silent... mouth piece went to near choke him ... don't tell don't tell don't tell ... blonde hair It started in Rome … that's all I can see .. walls blocking me … Emotional restraint.... Can't feel others until I clear myself first …. came in a rush. Held … don't speak … agreements made … can't touch me .. I feel .. trapped held back. Lies … blood ...
I am 7: I couldn't see the fear in his eyes because I was misdirected... I feel see it now … the only one who could see in .. filled with anger so I could not : I feel trapped ... I feel Abandoned by Our Lord. I feel deeds sold told they cannot be undone.... Feel … alone .... feel need to let the birds eat my soul If I can't never see the sun rise again. If all I am is this … kill the seed now .... I feel .... hope reaching out to me with a mouth throats choke hold In the darkness...seeking my light .. the street runner ... everyone needs a friend.... Not trying to rescue me ..... holding out like refugee.... holding out a hand " Come rescue me". Altered dreams lately did not see. Now I do Say Amen … as the war begins. Arch Angeles ready me … swords in ready … there is a storm coming ... Storm coming …. many speak of it. The powerful are going to fall …. the Righteous... stand ready … they point at You Take no soul under the love and protection and promise of our Lord Feel the righteous squeeze the last drop of security you might have ... I read my words like new just as you. These are 7 See that black sky? No ... we share a light... it's not mine its not yours … it's ours given from Grace Always my every two years friend I couldn't see the love for me because I … you know don't care tell me to explain